Call meJeffrey

I’m going to say something that I know everyone can agree with: I hate junk mail. Fliers, catalogs, direct-mail, advertisements, circulars, weeklies. I hate them all. Beyond them being a nuisance to city dwellers who have micro-mailboxes, I can’t even image the strain it all has on the planet. Before you dismiss this whole thing, keep in mind that I’m the furthest thing from a tree-hugger. I don’t like being outdoors much, I eat meat, I drive an SUV, and when I’m done with this can of Sugar-Free Red Bull I’m drinking – I’m going to throw it in the trash, and it will end up in a landfill. I’ll be the first one to admit that my problems with junk mail are that it annoys me, and it’s bad for the planet… in that order. However, what type of person I am shouldn’t play into whether or not something should be done about the problem.

I’ve been thinking about this for a while now. Seeing how my main motivation is personal annoyance, I did some research to see if there was anything like a “do not call” list, but for junk mail. It isn’t hard to find these services online. Wanna know why it’s not hard to find them? Because they’re businesses.

These services will…
“Rid your US Postal Service Mailbox of unwanted catalogs, coupon mailers, contest notices, fund raisers and other junk mail — Now!”
if you…
“Join Today for only $19.95″
but don’t worry, you can…
“Return as often as you want to cancel Catalogs and Junk Mail”
plus, there’s…
“Unlimited use for all Members of Household”
and hey…
“We Plant a tree for every new Subscription”
because, c’mon…
“What is your time worth?”

Jeesh, what IS my time worth? The only thing these services tell me is that it’s possible to opt out of the list, but it’s a pain in the ass so I should pay someone to do it for me. Well, I can’t hate on a business for being opportunistic… I guess.

So, that doesn’t really fix the problem. So I says to myself, “self – how would you fix the problem”? Hey, me! Glad you asked! Here’s my 2 cents. I think of things like a chain. The beginning of the chain is the company who’s deciding to send me bullshit, and the end of the chain is me. So let’s work backwards: Me > the mailman > my local post office > my regional post office > the USPS > the warehousing and delivery service > the fulfillment house > the printers > the keyliners > the graphic designer > the art director and copywriter > the creative director > the account manager > the senior account manager > the vp of client service > the owner of the ad agency who thinks 1% return on a direct-mail campaign equates success (and will take on direct mail to begin with) > the client, whose crap (that they paid for) ends up in my trashcan, day after day.

So where do you break the chain? Well, good luck with trying to get the USPS to boycott delivering junk mail. I’d also say good luck trying to appeal to a company’s better judgment against doing direct mail advertising to begin with. If it was up to me, I’d say the best way to end junk mail is through the people who make it. The agencies, the designers, the printers. If no agency will take on direct mail work, and no designer will design it and no printer will print it, then there’s nothing to send.

So my solution is to not have to pay yet another business to keep my life clutter free. Make some noise at the agencies, the designers, the printers. Get in touch with the owners of these businesses and tell them they’re the problem. If you’re a designer, take a stand! I can’t tell you how many people I know who won’t design for big tobacco but will most likely have no problem chugging away at direct mail knowing that their efforts will annoy people on a daily basis for an almost pointless effort. Personally, I don’t really see the difference. I can’t imagine what could be better PR (and we know it’s all about PR for the agency world) than saying “hey, we don’t care about the money – we simply refuse to participate in such a fruitless effort”.

Anyway, I’m about done ranting. I don’t do it often, so I promise it won’t happen for a while. So my point? We should do something more than simply throw away the junk mail. Let’s get it to stop.

UPDATE:
In a bizzaro-world twist of fate, Josh Spear wrote about junk mail a few days ago and I had no Idea until this morning! Glad to see like minded people are on the same page these days! Check out what he has to say on the matter. Here’s also a few interesting numbers gracefully borrowed from his post:

Junk Mail as it Affects You:

• More than 4 million tons (62,000,000,000 (billion) pieces) of junk mail are produced yearly.
• California’s state and local governments spend $500,000 each year collecting and disposing of AOL’s direct mail disks alone.
• $320 million of local taxes are used to dispose of unsolicited mail each year.
• It costs $550 million yearly to transport junk mail.

Junk Mail as it Affects the Environment:

• 100 million trees are ground up each year for unsolicited mail.
• 42% of timber harvested nationwide ends up as pulpwood for paper.
• It wastes 28 billion gallons of water for paper processing each year.
• If you cut your bulk mail for 5 years, you’ll conserve 1.7 trees, 700 gallons of water and prevent 460 pounds of carbon dioxide from being released into the air.